Sure you can hope. What else can you do?

Alright, it's done. I left Berlin on Friday after the opening match of the World Cup 2006. I spent a few days with the grandparents. It's weird to know that I might not see them again. It could happen everday. I hope it doesn't.

Now I'm in AC with my parents. 4 days left. I'm not excited yet cos it's still so far away and everything that happened too. I didn't realise for example that I'm done with that horrible college. Yay!

I'm out of my old life. I'm currently spending it with a friend. She was kind enough to let me live with her. :)

:wub:

And the end of it is getting closer.

Unbelievable how much one can miss someone. :(
And scary how fast you forget or confuse things. Especially in your dreams. *sigh*

@Martin. Hope you're getting better soon. *sends.healing.vibes*

@bby :-*

it begins.

I started early. All the planning and thinking and arranging. Then I started throwing parts of my life away. Today I started dismanteling it.

The first thing gone.

More to come.

People scare me. Not scare as in I fear they might hurt me but scare as in: I'm uncomfortable around them...especially large groups and people I don't know.

I knew it before but the following really made it clear.
I went to a bar with my friend Zara who wanted to meet some of her friends there. I stayed for over 4 hours but apart from hello, bye and some smiling I didn't talk to them at all. :( What's wrong with me?.. They've been really nice actually, talking to me "through" Zara..it was really funny, but as soon as Zara went to see her bf or to the bathroom I was stuck, couldn't think of anything to say or couldn't even look at them.

There's another guy who was obviously really drunk. He wanted me to dance with him. I said no cos I don't dance in front of other people (I did on 2 or 3 occasions but I dunno..it was a different scene, music and different people)...He didn't stop asking, even grabbed me by the hips (it didn't hurt but drunken* people are weird)..he was nice..not demanding but still..I felt horrible and nobody said anything. Hello? In the end, when I said bye to go home he said he had no idea in what state he'd leave the bar so he wanted a hug..I gave him one..really quick..he almost fell over when I pulled back..

I'm so not social-able... (I guess I just made that word up..maybe not) At least I'm not alone... V_V

sry.

22-20s split
The band decide to call it a day

Following four years together, the band have decided to part ways blaming an intensive touring schedule which "put us in a state of arrested development at a crucial time".

In a lengthy statement on the band's Myspace page, myspace.com/2220s, singer Martin Trimble said: "Listening to Lightnin' Hopkins, Albert King and Buddy Guy made me want to pick up a guitar. What immediately made me fall in love with blues was the rawness, simplicity and the truth of it. I wanted 22-20s to be about taking that essence and using it as fuel to create something both we and other people could relate to.

"I think initially most bands wear their influences on their sleeve but for a number of reasons we've not been able to go beyond that first stage. It was always our desire to start writing and recording a follow-up record as soon as the first studio album was recorded. That didn't happen - we toured for a year and a half. There is a prevailing myth within music that touring is always the hard-working, 'honest' way to connect with people. The reality for us is that I think it is difficult to move away from a certain sound when you are reminded of it every night. Unfortunately we were not surrounded by people who understood that."


He continued: "Honesty is about playing songs you passionately believe in, playing in a band you passionately believe in and I am no longer able to say that about 22-20s. I am no longer comfortable being in a band named after a blues song. Much like the last record it indicates where I was four years ago and what I was listening to. It doesn't accurately reflect what I listen to now and where I want to go. I'm no longer comfortable with people's perception of what we represent.

"Being in a hard working, British-blues touring band has never been something I've wished to endorse yet that's we what appear to have drifted into. In light of this, a decision has been made to call it a day and to go our separate ways."

Trimble revealed that he is currently working on new material.

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I can't believe it. :( At least I've seen them live in London which was great. *sigh* :(

Hm..I don't really know what to write. At the moment I'm about to be absolutely lost. College has turned into HELL and since it's the main thing in my life at the moment it's able to destroy me. Not only me. My friends feel the same. We dunno how to keep our heads up, we dunno how to keep calm and sane until May. It seems so far away.

I try to tell myself that it's close..that it's almost over...
3 months.

*sigh*

At least another "problem" has been solved.

1 month. *sigh.again*

..



What do we expect?
What do we want from it...and what not?
What will it bring?

What about the old year?
What did we expect? Little
What did we want from it? Alot
What did it bring? Everything.

We met old friends, new enemies; found a new love and almost lost it...twice; we had dreams, some came true, some didn't; discovered new bands, new films, new worlds...

We cried our souls out, laughed ourselves to pieces; we've been loud and silent, big and small, healthy and sick, funny and boring, smart and blank, loved and hated, rich and poor, happy and sad.....

This year will bring us the same, probably. Almost definitely.
Some people will stay blank, some will scare you with their cleverness.
Some will make more money, some won't.
Some will have a family, some will stay alone.
Some will be loved forever, some people we hate a bit more.

Whatever it is....just try to stay alive....

Love, Nev